Make your own evil plan!

Tuesday, December 14, 2004

Here in Nardac headquarters, we're coming up with fresh ideas everyday for 2005. Not content with 2004's already high standards, such as a stripping fax machine and auto-burning forest, our great colleagues have come up with a new plan. Check it out:

Congratulations on being the creator of a new Evil Plan (tm)!

Your objective is simple: Destroy the Earth
Your motive is a little bit more complex: Love (Yes, it works)

Stage One:

To begin your plan, you must first Assassinate a Town Mascot. This will cause the world to sit up and take notice, stunned by your arrival. Who is this Ripe Bastard? Where did they come from? And why do they look so good as a Brain in a Jar?

Stage Two:

Next, you will Contaminate/poison the Moon (ooh, tides!). This will cause countless hordes of the Undead to flock to you, begging to do your every bidding. Your name will become synonymous with Fuzzy bunnies, as lesser men whisper your name in terror.

Stage Three:

Finally, you will Covertly Move your Needlessly Big Weather Machine, bringing about Pain, suffering, the usual. This will all be done from a Island of Mu, an excellent choice if we might say. These three deeds will herald the end, and the citizens of this planet will have no choice but to elect you their new god.

Trust us, it'll all come together in the end.

you need to have a very evil plan too? check this out