who wears a muscle shirt to a dogfight?

Friday, January 28, 2005

Ok, so it was like last night, around midnight, and I flipped the TV on because france seems to have a new upcoming figure dancing champion, Brian Joubert. But, I really wasn't going in to see him. Who knows about this guy? He looks like Joe Schmo, but french, so Jean Blond. So JB/BJ flips out on the ice and starts whizzing around. My god, it has been a long time since I watched figure skating! Everybody has a quad in their program now! That's normal, to spit up into the sky and spin four times around? Poor Elvis Stojko. He really thought they'd call it the Stojko, instead of the QUAD. But saying Stojko and Quad are remarkably alike:

For example if I say:

Yo! Shut up you stupid Quad!
or
Stop if with the Stojko!

you get it? you get it? Not so different ain't it.

Anyways, back to JB. He's flying around but I don't really care. Why? Because you only had to have a couple of blinks in the last couple of years in figure skating to know who's the little king out there. Oh yeah, more Russian White Power. His name is Plushenko, and he ain't no pushover yo! He's the mighty mighty force of Quads and spins. The only man on ice to do a Bielman, and the only guy who keep his platinum hair in bowlshape, 365 days/year. And look at the type of costumes he comes up with! Muscle shirt anyone?

plushenko

Yeah, so last night our Russian prince tore up the ice to a techno version of "The Godfather," specially rendered in E.European humping techno just for the competition. I can't stop watching this guy. Am I being sucked slowly but sure into the hole of bad taste? Gosh, I did just buy a bunch of neon underwear!